Make-up Challeneged

In high school I started attempting to wear make-up. I started with powder (easy enough) and unfortunately thought it was cute to glob on some eye liner under my eyes (it wasn't by the way). Then, some time at the beginning of my freshman year of college, one of my roommates (the one with the drug dealer boyfriend who asked to hide weed in our air vents... a story for another time) showed me how to put on eye shadow. And a short while after that I finally perfected applying a straight line of eye liner to my upper lids.

Still to this day I do my eye shadow only the way she showed me and although I have since discovered mascara and concealer I consider myself challenged in the make-up department. No matter what I try, it always ends up looking the same. Not only do I lack the knowledge of how to apply it properly but I also don't even really know what to buy.

I currently want to punch my mascara because it comes out all clumpy and makes my lashes look like tarantula legs, which is not at all what I am going for. And my lipstick does a disappearing act a short twenty minutes after application. This is where I ask you all for help. Suggestions on which make-up to use (budget friendly, of course!), advice on how to apply said make-up, tips, tricks, anything!

Although I suppose if your tips don't work I could always switch to markers. They seem to work for her:

I think she might be on to something here. Maybe I'll even try the scented ones?