Confessions of a Co-Sleeper...

One of our biggest struggles as first time parents has been dealing with sleep issues. When Sadie was a newborn the girl could sleep anywhere, anytime. It was glorious. We developed a nice little schedule loosely following the Baby Wise routine of Eat Awake Sleep. She was sleeping in her crib, nursing on cue like a champ! And then she hit four months.

do not let this image of a peaceful sleeping baby fool you

It all started when I attempted to cut one of her night nursing sessions (at the time she was waking up twice a night). That attempt backfired and spiraled into hourly night wakings so quickly that I don't even know how it happened. I try looking back to pinpoint something I did or didn't do but even at the time it was a blur (probably due to sleep depravation, am I right?).

For the next four months I awoke every hour to two hours to nurse and put her back in her crib. It was a terrible habit that I was allowing but at the time I was tired, not willing to allow her to "cry it out" and determined to keep her in her own bed and that was the quickest way to get her back to sleep. Meanwhile everyone I talked to who had children close to Sadie's age had babies that slept through the night without any trouble and had been doing so for months. That is where a very important parenting lesson comes into play: Do NOT compare your child to other children or your parenting to that of other parents. Every one parents differently, every child is different. Period. Sounds like common sense right? Then why is it such a hard concept to grasp?

At eight months we went on a lovely beach vacation with my in-laws and I knew sleep was going to be an even bigger issue there. After many failed attempts to get Sadie back to sleep the first night I did what I swore I would never do... I brought her in bed with me. And guess what? She slept. After sleeping in bed with me for a week on vacation my body had gotten used to actually sleeping when it was supposed to so when we got home I simply could not physically go back to waking up every hour to go into her room, nurse her, and put her back to bed.

on vacation, super happy to get her down for a nap!

Thus began the co-sleeping. She sleeps in her crib for naps and starts bedtime there every night (waking every couple of hours while there) until I am ready for bed and then she joins us and sleeps until 7:30/8am. For a long time I was embarrassed to admit this for it is something I have always sworn I would not do (you notice as a parent that is a reoccurring theme). But it is what works for our family. We all get sleep this way. It is certainly not something I want to last for much longer (more on the plan for that later) although I will certainly miss waking up to Sadie snuggles and giggles every morning.

how can you not like seeing that first thing in the morning

The underlying moral of the story (other than the simple fact that we all really do need sleep) is to own your decisions. As moms we are often criticized and judged for the way we do things, especially by other moms. But the truth of the matter is that your way is the right way. It may not be the right way for your co-worker or your best friend but it is right for your family so be confident in that because at the end of the day you are caring for your family and doing the best you can and that's all there is to it.