Beauty and the Banker: Big decisions...

If you have been reading along lately I am sure you can tell that going back to work has been very hard on me. I sob every morning on the car ride to work and again while I pump (4 times during my 12 hour shift). I even cry on the car ride home. I know she is in great hands while away from me but it still just does not feel right.

My stomach remains in knots throughout the day, no matter how busy I keep myself. It just feels wrong to be away from her. Everyone has been telling me it gets easier. And maybe it does but it didn't take long for me to realize that being a working mom isn't right for me.

After talking it over with the hubs we were able to work it out so that I am able to stay home with Sadie full-time for at least the first year of her life. I cannot explain how much this means to me. The hubs did not even question it when I kept coming home in tears and told him that I just couldn't do it. I couldn't be away from her like that. Instead he supported me and told me we would make it work. And that is exactly what we are going to do.